Last night some very good friends and I went out to see a pseudo Haligonian/Monctonian at the Hi-Fi. It was a strange experience, but Julie made me feel better about life. Mostly I just wanted to go home and listen to music at my own decible level.
Calgary is strange. But I am trying to find enought things to like about it to make it bearable to be here.
I am a bit overwhelmed by life, and having to do so many things that while doing them is fun, doing so many at once becomes tedious and blah.
I am trying to make more art. I want to make a serious art portfolio. Which will take a lot of work I think, but I want to do this for myself.
My lovely girlfriend did an interview with an unnamed musician who had this to say:
Wet on wet is an oil painting technique I became familiar with while working at an art supply store. As a 'customer service agent' for persons who are or consider themselves artists, you inevitably end up dealing with a lot of unsatisfied people with money to burn and only the hands of time to accompany them for the long, slow, tortuous walk toward the end of their well-groomed existence. most of these, sadly, would be what many might refer to as 'retired trophy wives':women in their 60s and older who have exhausted (and still, in some tragic cases, try desperately to hold onto, resulting in the worst kind of self-parody) their looks and social graces, waiting around for the husbands who never encouraged or really cared but have no problem doling out an allowance to their better halves in exchange for a blind eye while they indulge in their quest to defeat age by cavorting around with twenty year old secretaries in their sporty new mazda.
This is so true. I wish it actually were less true, but this is my life lately. I've been spending most of my days in the richer southern neighbourhood of Marda Loop selling art supplies to people who probably don't even deserve them, but think they do because they have the money to pay for them. This is why I'm bitter. These people are overly high strung and believe that I am there to cater to their every desire. It is not fun.
To top things off my boss and co-worker is probabyl insane, some days I feel like I could knock her over with a feather, and other days she's on a power trip, and other days she just doesn't talk at all. This is worse then working alone, because working alone offers the freedom that working with another person can not. Being ignored sucks. That is all.
Also, I am exhausted. Life is exhausting, and I wish I was one of those kids who seem to have energy and never have to sleep, but lately i'm out cold by 11:30 and dragging myself out of bed at 9.
But anyway, it's the summer, and I'm going to try to start making art.
